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Michael Rielly

Parents urged to stop pretending Father Christmas is real

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Michael Rielly

Parents urged to stop pretending Father Christmas is real

The Telegraph

EXCERPT:

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Parents have been urged to stop pretending Father Christmas is real in case the "lie" damages relations with their children.

Spinning stories about Santa risks undermining a child's trust and is morally suspect, according to two experts.

Psychologist Professor Christopher Boyle and social scientist Dr Kathy McKay also condemn the idea of a "terrifying" North Pole intelligence agency which judges children to be nice or naughty.

Writing in the respected journal The Lancet Psychiatry, they argue: "If they (parents) are capable of lying about something so special and magical, can they be relied upon to continue as the guardians of wisdom and truth?"

In addition they suggest parents may not be motivated by thoughts of their children but a selfish desire to re-live their own childhood.

Defending the claims, Prof Boyle, from the University of Exeter, said: "The morality of making children believe in such myths has to be questioned.

"All children will eventually find out they've been consistently lied to for years, and this might make them wonder what other lies they've been told.

"Whether it's right to make children believe in Father Christmas is an interesting question, and it's also interesting to ask whether lying in this way will affect children in ways that have not been considered."

Dr McKay, from the University of New England in Australia, said there was clear evidence from the world of make-believe in movies and TV that adults looked for a chance to be children again.

"The persistence of fandom in stories like Harry Potter, Star Wars and Doctor Who well into adulthood demonstrates this desire to briefly re-enter childhood," she said.

In an article entitled A Wonderful Lie the authors write: "Perhaps the biggest moral breach of the Christmas lie comes with the fact that one day, the truth comes out.

"Children must all find out eventually that their parents have blatantly and consistently carried on a lie for a number of years. Children may find out from a third party, or through their parents getting bored of the make-believe and making a mistake; both might affect the trust that exists between child and parent.

"If adults have been lying about Santa, even though it has usually been well intentioned, what else is a lie? If Santa isn't real, are fairies real? Is magic? Is God?"

They conclude: "Many people may yearn for a time when imagination was accepted and encouraged, which may not be the case in adult life. Might it be the case that the harshness of real life requires the creation of something better, something to believe in, something to hope for in the future or to return to a long-lost childhood a long time ago in a galaxy far far away?"

 

SOURCE: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2016/11/24/parents-urged-stop-pretending-father-christmas-real/

 

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Santa Castor

You would think there would be empirical evidence of psychological damage from believing

in Santa Claus et al. I have often heard adults blaming their current status on their upbringing, 

althought I have never heard any specify Santa, the Easter Bunny, or the Tooth Fairy for their woes.

Quite the contrary, it seems they complain that their parents were not involved in their lives.  

Fantasy beliefs, require participation from a child's parent or parent figure, as well as the "village" as a whole.

So, these experts in their field, would have us believe that lying or misrepresentation to a child is poor

parenting.  Perhaps we should discontinue stranger danger programs, and all the various scare techniques

that parents use to raise their children.  Percentage-wise there is little chance that a child would ever be

exposed to the outcomes we tell them is inevitable if they ignore our directions.  I suppose Aesop's Fables 

and any fictional story that teaches a moral value will be considered too restrictive to free thought soon as well.

God helps us all, and that is something I will be teaching my child as well, regardless how the mainstream

will fight me.

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SantaJoe

I actually had this conversion with our Asst. Paster (who a friend) before his child was born. He had similar concerns. Thankfully he allowed his son to believe in Santa. Last year while visiting at my Church's Christmas Party, one of our member's daughter Kara who was 8 years old told me that some of her class mates had been saying 'Santa wasn't real". Before I could respond she said, "I told them Christmas isn't about Santa. It's about Jesus. Santa is the Christmas Spirit that lives in your heart'! Well said Kara!

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Santa G

Huh so the dude from the Santa Clause movie finally got published good on em. Lol

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Schwindy
4 hours ago, Michael Rielly said:

Spinning stories about Santa risks undermining a child's trust and is morally suspect, according to two experts.

Psychologist Professor Christopher Boyle and social scientist Dr Kathy McKay also condemn the idea of a "terrifying" North Pole intelligence agency which judges children to be nice or naughty.

Well their you go everyone! We are all going to be out of work and NOTHING will be able to stop "them", BECAUSE the "TWO EXPERTS" said so!

:sc_rofl:     :sc_rofl:     Animal House: Bluto's Big Speech, You tube it, I can't play it here! It's a little more than PG - 13 and naughty language but I will admit, the first thing I thought of when I read this post!

But  NOT surprised either that this is just one more thing we have been doing wrong since way back when! 

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Santa Forbey

Next thing you'll discover "professionals" telling parents to stop telling their children God is real.  As parents, and grandparents, we have to draw a line, regarding the parenting of our children.  My children, all grown up with children of their own, have been taught, by me, about what is real about Santa and what is myth. They've been taught all of the good things we as Santa's representatives can do and teach to help children understand the principles of selfless giving and unconditional love. I've also taught them about how to use Santa, as a disciple of Christ. To teach about the reason for Christmas, and how to be a giving and caring citizen of humanity.

I don't need some godless, over-educated "professional" screwing up the heads of my children or grandchildren. They've been taught, by the father, grandfather, and Santa, how to be loving, caring, law-abiding  participants in their homes, communities, country and world.  AND I REFUSE TO RELINQUISH THAT RESPONSIBILITY!

Santa  Forbey

Edited by Santa Forbey
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SantaMikeUK

Perhaps these "experts" should turn their fire on to politicians. After all, they lie through their back teeth all the time. Anyway, we all know what an "expert" is don't we? "Ex" is something that has been, and "spe(u)rt" is a drip under pressure!

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SCSanta

This seems like a prime example of 'post hoc ergo propter hoc' (Latin for 'after therefore because of') which basically attributes cause and affect by the order in which they occur. A child believes in Santa -> A child grows up with issues -> Believing in Santa causes a child to grow up with issues! It is the most simple minded philosophical rubbish out there. It discounts all other intervening effects. It is the same logic that explains that breathing air causes illness because people who are ill breath air...therefore, breathing air is bad for you.

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Post_hoc,_ergo_propter_hoc

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Felix Estridge
3 hours ago, SCSanta said:

This seems like a prime example of 'post hoc ergo propter hoc' (Latin for 'after therefore because of') which basically attributes cause and affect by the order in which they occur. A child believes in Santa -> A child grows up with issues -> Believing in Santa causes a child to grow up with issues! It is the most simple minded philosophical rubbish out there. It discounts all other intervening effects. It is the same logic that explains that breathing air causes illness because people who are ill breath air...therefore, breathing air is bad for you.

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Post_hoc,_ergo_propter_hoc

I call it not taking responsibility for your actions.

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Dr Santa Steve

Every parent has to make this decision. Personally, Christmas morning and the excitement of seeing what Santa brought for us, are some of my fondest childhood memories. I wouldn't deprive my child of the pleasure I got to enjoy. I harbor no ill will toward my parents for "the lie". I am grateful that they cared enough to make Christmas special for us. It would have been easier for them to just tell us Santa was a myth. Besides, we all know Santa does exist.

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Tom Berent

Well you know what they say "When you stop believing in Santa Claus that's when you start getting socks and underwear for Christmas"

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Bama Kringle
On ‎11‎/‎27‎/‎2016 at 6:33 PM, Michael Rielly said:

 

They conclude: "Many people may yearn for a time when imagination was accepted and encouraged, which may not be the case in adult life. Might it be the case that the harshness of real life requires the creation of something better, something to believe in, something to hope for in the future or to return to a long-lost childhood a long time ago in a galaxy far far away?"

 

Let's see: Parents may encourage belief in their children because the parents are nostalgic for a happy period of innocence, imagination, and childhood.

Therefore, let's make sure their children never have such a period in their lives.  Then they will not attempt to re-live it through their own children.

Yeah, that sounds a LOT healthier.......:rolleyes:

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Santa Tragen
On 11/30/2016 at 3:02 PM, Tom Berent said:

Well you know what they say "When you stop believing in Santa Claus that's when you start getting socks and underwear for Christmas"

HAHAHA I mean HOHOHO !

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SantaMikeUK
On 30/11/2016 at 9:02 PM, Tom Berent said:

Well you know what they say "When you stop believing in Santa Claus that's when you start getting socks and underwear for Christmas"

I often share a secret with the children. The secret is that I tell them to watch the grown ups on Christmas morning, and if a grown up unwraps socks, it means they are on the Naughty List. The kids love the thought.

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