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How Santa and brave women, like Meghan Markle, are helping me process an unimaginable loss


Rob Thompson

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How Santa and brave women, like Meghan Markle, are helping me process an unimaginable loss

Source:  Brynn Gingras, CNN December 10, 2020

(CNN) I woke up on a Monday morning, a few weeks before Christmas, and in my inbox was an assignment to do a story on how malls, shopping centers and Santas would be adapting to our new Covid-world this year. I was thrilled! After months of heavy, heartbreaking headlines, I was tapped to cover something fun, creative and uplifting.

I spent the day lining up interviews, talking to real-life, jolly Santas from around the Northeast. It was expectedly refreshing. But even that wasn't greater than what I was about to do on Thursday. I had a doctor's appointment scheduled to see my unborn baby for the first time, hear the heartbeat and get that coveted ultrasound photograph that I planned to send in a Christmas card to my in-laws in Ireland.

This pandemic has brought challenges to so many people in various ways, but it may be easily forgotten that there is an entire population of women who are going through the process of pregnancy, essentially alone.
Every check-up, every ultrasound, every benchmark in growing a baby is being experienced alone as partners aren't usually allowed into these appointments because of Covid-19 restrictions. Sure, they may just be doctor visits, but when it comes to learning every detail of your unborn child's life, expectant mothers crave these updates. And with them comes a whirlwind of emotions as you work to meet each milestone in the grueling, but beautiful, nine-month journey.

Full, and worthwhile story here :  https://edition.cnn.com/2020/12/10/opinions/miscarriage-brave-women-pandemic-santa-gingras/index.html

 

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Story brought back some sad memories, still after 25+ years.  My wife had a miscarriage after being over 5 months along.  What jumped out at me the most back then was the number of people that had gone through the same thing and how they reached out to my wife at the time - not so much to me, but knowing how devastated I felt I was so appreciative of any comfort they brought to my wife.  Luckily it was not our first child.  I can't imagine the pain, stress, fear, and every other emotion that couples go through when they have 1 or more miscarriages when they are trying to have their first child.

Prayers for comfort to all who have gone through or will go though this tragedy.

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8 minutes ago, RusticSanta said:

Story brought back some sad memories, still after 25+ years.  My wife had a miscarriage after being over 5 months along.  What jumped out at me the most back then was the number of people that had gone through the same thing and how they reached out to my wife at the time - not so much to me, but knowing how devastated I felt I was so appreciative of any comfort they brought to my wife.  Luckily it was not our first child.  I can't imagine the pain, stress, fear, and every other emotion that couples go through when they have 1 or more miscarriages when they are trying to have their first child.

Prayers for comfort to all who have gone through or will go though this tragedy.

It is a massive loss at any time Rustic and so sorry to hear of your experience. I know exactly what yhou mean about the support offered, as the loss impacts upon both parents, I guess its just a normal thing how people tend to direct their support initially to the mother. You are right, the loss never really goes.

My sister, tried for approx 8 years to have her first child, sadly all of the pregnancies miscarried. The impact upon her and my brother in law was immeasurable. However God and science combined and she now has tow healthy boys via artificial insemination. A happier couple you could not wish for. My wife and I have one child, 32 yrs old now but similar circumstances meant we could only have one, but we are so blessed to have her. ( I do question that on occasion :) ) 

But you are correct I could not imagine not being able to have children,

Take care my friend and we shall enjoy who and what we have.

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