Santa lies ‘traumatize’ children: Gen Z moms

[Michael Rielly]

Santa lies ‘traumatize’ children: Gen Z moms

New York Post
November 30, 2022

EXCERPT:

Sierra McKenzie’s three small children, who range in age from 3 weeks to 3 years, won’t be taking pictures with Mr. and Mrs. Claus this Christmas. They also won’t find any presents tagged “From: Santa” under their tree on December 25.

That’s because McKenzie, 23, is refusing to perpetuate beloved myths about a jolly man with a big belly and a red hat.

“Telling kids that Santa is real is a lie, and I don’t believe in building my kids up on a lie,” McKenzie, a stay-at-home mom from North Dakota, told The Post. Viral video of her anti-Santa sentiments have scored nearly 10,000 views on TikTok.

McKenzie allows her little ones festive pursuits such as making wish lists, baking cookies and watching Christmas movies. But, she teaches her tots that Santa, rather than being an omniscient demigod who “sees you when your sleeping” and “knows if you’ve been bad or good,” is merely a make-believe character with no bearing on their holiday.

“The magic of Christmas shouldn’t be built up on Santa,” she said. “It’s about the gift of giving to one another.”

Santa is the latest tradition to fall victim to Generation Z and their new notions about how things should be done. Under the trending TikTok hashtag #SantaIsntReal, which has amassed over 14 million views, hordes of young parents are arguing that not only is St. Nick a fictional figure, that he is also potentially traumatizing to children.  

“I don’t want to scare my children into thinking that they have to behave a certain way or that they were more ‘naughty or nice,’ than another child based on Christmas gifts,” said Chloe Amelle, 24, a mom of two and parenting influencer from southern Utah.

She feels that telling her 2-year-old and 3-month-old the truth about Santa is a form of gentle parenting — a trendy child-rearing style that governs kids with kindness and respect rather than demands and threats.

A TikTok clip detailing her aversion to promoting the North Pole dweller to her tykes has earned over 11,000 likes.

“As a gentle parent, I’m teaching my kids to do things because it’s what’s best for them,” she said. “And using Santa to tell teach your kids to be good in exchange for gifts [counteracts] the lesson of being good for the sake of being good.”

Sarah Ockwell-Smith, a childcare expert and author of “The Gentle Parenting Book,” told The Post that while there isn’t an official gentle parenting stance on the Santa Claus myth, moms and dads should be careful not to weaponize the once-lauded gift giver.    

“Threatening kids with ‘I’ll tell Santa on you!’ is just going to kill festive joy and make both parents and children stressed,” Ockwell-Smith said. “The threats keep escalating until parents are left with the decision of whether to ruin Christmas and follow through on them or to go back on what they’ve said and seem like an inconsistent pushover.”

Gentle parenting expert Sarah Ockwell-Smith says moms and dads could mentally and emotionally scar their kids by inappropriately perpetuating the Santa lie.
Shutterstock

She added that spooking kids into believing that Santa is a watchful know-it-all can, in fact, prompt lasting agony.

“The idea of an all-seeing, judgmental mythical being spying on children is quite trauma inducing,” she said. “There’s no surprise that so many kids cry when they meet Santa.”

SOURCE: https://nypost.com/2022/11/30/santa-lies-traumatize-children-gen-z-moms/

 

 

[Jeff Hillyard]

I feel that whoever wrote this article is going out of their way to paint the younger generation as ultra-left wing threats to society, as a way to generate clicks and advertising dollars, and I fear many of us are going to fall for it.

Fear not fellow Santa's. While this parent is exercising their rights to raise their children as they wish, and most of us will disagree with this approach in regards to Santa, the vast majority of parents uphold the tradition of Santa Claus.

[Santa SteveKl]

Very true, I have had many of the Gen Z parents bring their children to see me. When they realize I am real bearded, they are so willing to let their children see, touch, and believe in Santa. I have also seen them spark up to a traditional bearded Santa as well who was just as real as I am.

[Studio Kringle]

I have so much to say about this and it is so hard to say because I do not want to share negative views towards anybody as it is just not Santa like.  Any story is how you spin it.  I have always believed that saying "I'm going to tell Santa that you're bad and he won't bring you any gifts" is just as wrong as saying "I'm going to tell the police officer that you are behaving poorly and he is going to take you to jail" both statements target people that have nothing to do with your parenting problem. It just takes the onus off of the parent as the "bad guy" and makes some children afraid of Police Officers & Santas.  Those are people who are "supposed" to be helpers & givers to everyone.  

Unfortunately there will always be negatively, cynicism & non- believers however, there will always be believers who are positive & imaginative thinkers. You make the choice to spin your story whatever way you wish.  Which type of person sounds more fun and less stressing to you? How will you choose to spin your story?

Be kind and no matter what, Santa loves you!

[Grandpa Gus]

Each and every parent must decide how they will bring up their children. As someone who portrays Santa, I believe that I am only reflecting and hope to serve as a reminder of the birth of Christ and the gifts that came with him and from him. I want children and parents to take away from a visit with "Santa" a sense of kindness, a sense that someone cares, an understanding of gentleness between people, a sense of hope, a belief in things they cannot see or touch and so much more. I hope that a visit with "Santa" will forestall a child learning of all the "real things" in life until a time when they can comprehend those things and put them into their proper place in life. There are times when I put on the Red Suit, and I think about the message that I want to convey, and it becomes very heavy until you see the children and think about how much you impact them and their families. Hopefully for the better.

[Sundblom Santa]

These people really need to get a life. This is, what, the second sort of “news” article I’ve seen in (maybe) two weeks on this type of thing? (Still, many, many thanks to Mike for letting us know—we really do have to know and understand that such Puritanical killjoys are out there.)

Whatever happened to letting children enjoy Christmas? Then again, these people don’t know how to have fun. Ignore them and move on. I most certainly did. Of course, unlike some folks out there (not anyone here, I assure you), I’m not going to blame all of Gen Z for the stupid actions of a few (that’s not even fair).

Edited December 1, 2022 by Sundblom Santa

[Drosselmeyer]

ugh - what else can you say

[Rob Thompson]

Im just passing on the group of adults who decide to become irredeemable  Grinch parents  

(PS, I do however agree, we shouldn't be threaten children that Santa will not visit if they are naughty)

 

[Black Hills Santa]

If you don;t want Santa, fine. Just look at what is really scarring kids: poor parenting and pathetic school systems

[Santa Castor]

Social media has given the niches' a megaphone.  It will be a very minor percent of the population.  Unfortunately I suspect her children will be prone to ruining it for their fellow kids.

Obviously she has considered her stance very carefully and feels her decision warrants consideration and implementation by  everyone.

I do wonder what else she refuses to lie about to her children, but I feel guilty about it.

[AsaClaus]

Two things. One, Santa is a SPIRIT and not a person. No one man is Santa, but each and every one of us can become Santa through our openness to generosity, our willingness to share kindness and compassion and our insistence that each and every child is important and to be fostered with wonder and magic. To say “Santa is fake” is to say that those very traits and principles are fake. 
 

Second, no. No we should never use Santa or the Elf on a Shelf or anything as a threat. This actually speaks to the naughty list as well. Children who act naughty 99% of the time are dealing with things we don’t know about or refuse to see. There was a great moment in Fred Claus that covers this idea. 

[Tommy]

If a parent chooses to downplay Santa Claus, he/she has that right.  I can't say I agree with it, I grew up with Santa Claus and I turned out just fine!!!   I wonder how parents deal with their child's imaginary friend(s)? 

As a minister with over 30 years experience,  I have watched many parents through the years and observed their "parenting styles", mostly the lack of good parenting.   I love to stand back and watch a parent "reason" with a 3 year old.  Very little is accomplished at the end of that gentle "reasoning" session except the parent leaves frustrated and the child hasn't had anything changed, except maybe his/her diaper/pull-up.  I also see way too many younger parents shoving an iphone in front of their small child just to help maintain the child's behavior.

I'm going to stop now.     

          

[Sundblom Santa]

37 minutes ago, Tommy said:

If a parent chooses to downplay Santa Claus, he/she has that right.  I can't say I agree with it, I grew up with Santa Claus and I turned out just fine!!!   I wonder how parents deal with their child's imaginary friend(s)?

Exactly. And, of course, all imaginary friends (and imagination itself, of course) are out under such parents.

38 minutes ago, Tommy said:

As a minister with over 30 years experience

Thank you for your service, Tommy. “It is a trustworthy statement: if any man aspires to the office of overseer, it is a fine work he desires to do” (1 Tim. 3:1). Thank you for it.

41 minutes ago, Tommy said:

I have watched many parents through the years and observed their "parenting styles", mostly the lack of good parenting.   I love to stand back and watch a parent "reason" with a 3 year old.  Very little is accomplished at the end of that gentle "reasoning" session except the parent leaves frustrated and the child hasn't had anything changed, except maybe his/her diaper/pull-up.  I also see way too many younger parents shoving an iphone in front of their small child just to help maintain the child's behavior.

Good parenting (which includes understanding that a three year old is not an adult, as well as not shoving an iPhone in front of their face and acting as if that somehow replaces good parenting skills) really seems hard to come by. Of course, there are wonderful parents out there (many of us were lucky).

46 minutes ago, Tommy said:

I'm going to stop now.

Thanks for sharing!

[SantaFredNY]

HA! I can think of plenty other myths that are pushed as truths by the zoomers. 

[TamaleClaus]

Children raised without imagination or make believe. Doesn't sound like a very interesting childhood?

Wonder how Walt Disney would have faired?

[AsaClaus]

7 hours ago, TamaleClaus said:

Children raised without imagination or make believe. Doesn't sound like a very interesting childhood?

Wonder how Walt Disney would have faired?

I understand their point of view as much as I disagree with it. Santa isn't being displayed as make believe. It’s being presented at real. Personally, I believe Santa is real so there’s no issue for me. 

[Sundblom Santa]

9 hours ago, TamaleClaus said:

Wonder how Walt Disney would have faired?

Not well, I’m afraid. Interestingly enough—to keep a long story short—a little Christmas gift of a pair of boots helped Walt’s journey to become who he would end up being (that’s a story for a different day). Although it doesn’t have anything to do with Santa Claus per se, it’s a good story about how God can employ even the simplest of gifts to shape a person’s future. If anyone would be interested in reading about it, they can do that here:

https://www.mouseplanet.com/9463/The_Best_Walt_Christmas_Story

[SCSanta]

I have a response that I feel is worthy of her opinion...   

[AsaClaus]

Let’s not judge too harshly. Remember, Christmas was outlawed by the church for a long time. Beliefs change. Popularity and acceptance changes. 

[SCSanta]

Edited December 5, 2022 by SCSanta

[SantaJoe]

Blah, Blah, Blah...... In my 18 years of portraying Santa Claus I have never met an adult that was harmed by believing Santa Claus, but I have met many who held a resentment against their parents for not allowing them to believe in Santa Claus as a child!

[Santa SteveKl]

37 minutes ago, SantaJoe said:

Blah, Blah, Blah...... In my 18 years of portraying Santa Claus I have never met an adult that was harmed by believing Santa Claus, but I have met many who held a resentment against their parents for not allowing them to believe in Santa Claus as a child!

I just had a older young lady- a mother- who wanted to sit with Santa for her picture which was always her childhood dream! 

[Sundblom Santa]

1 hour ago, SantaJoe said:

Blah, Blah, Blah...... In my 18 years of portraying Santa Claus I have never met an adult that was harmed by believing Santa Claus, but I have met many who held a resentment against their parents for not allowing them to believe in Santa Claus as a child!

22 minutes ago, Santa SteveKl said:

I just had a older young lady- a mother- who wanted to sit with Santa for her picture which was always her childhood dream!

Indeed—a child not allowed to believe in Santa Claus appears, to me, to be quite unfortunate. To rob your child of that joy and those precious memories really seems to be a tragic example of modern “parenting” (no Santa Claus, no Tooth Fairy, no Easter Bunny, no fairytales, no storybooks, and no pretending).

Edited December 5, 2022 by Sundblom Santa

[Rob Thompson]

7 hours ago, Sundblom Santa said:

Indeed—a child not allowed to believe in Santa Claus appears, to me, to be quite unfortunate. To rob your child of that joy and those precious memories really seems to be a tragic example of modern “parenting” (no Santa Claus, no Tooth Fairy, no Easter Bunny, no fairytales, no storybooks, and no pretending).

Dont be silly, everyone believes in the Easter Bunny, I mean, where the heck do you think Chocolate Easter Eggs come from!    

[AsaClaus]

17 hours ago, Sundblom Santa said:

Indeed—a child not allowed to believe in Santa Claus appears, to me, to be quite unfortunate. To rob your child of that joy and those precious memories really seems to be a tragic example of modern “parenting” (no Santa Claus, no Tooth Fairy, no Easter Bunny, no fairytales, no storybooks, and no pretending).

Eh, I can’t write it off as “modern parenting”. All people are different people. I feel bad for this woman as I’m sure this comes from having some sort of trust broken in her past. But all in all I think modern parenting is patient, loving and solution based. But maybe I’m biased as a modern parent! LOL

[Sundblom Santa]

5 hours ago, AsaClaus said:

But all in all I think modern parenting is patient, loving and solution based. But maybe I’m biased as a modern parent! LOL

As it should be. Good points!

[Fezziwig]

I think teaching kids about Santa is important, but not just out of tradition or fun. In a weird way, I think it's important because it prepares them for life a little bit. When you find out that Santa's not real, it hurts! It's disappointing! But it steels you for the bigger lies that'll come later. If you never have any kind of injury, then skinning your knee at 30 will affect you way more than it would for most.

 

Quote

“All right," said Susan. "I'm not stupid. You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable."

REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE.

"Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little—"

YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES.

"So we can believe the big ones?"

YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING.

"They're not the same at all!"

YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET—Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED.

"Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point—"

MY POINT EXACTLY.”

― Terry Pratchett, Hogfather

 

[Santa Johnny Boy]

Someone tell these Karens to get a life!

[Michael Rielly]

The more I learn about the GenZ generation they more I feel the human race is doomed...

[Rob Thompson]

20 minutes ago, Michael Rielly said:

The more I learn about the GenZ generation they more I feel the human race is doomed...